being uninhibited

A Deep Listening

It's been two months since the last Uninhibited Retreat. It was a beautiful, small gathering and once again, it opened my heart and renewed my spirit in ways that intimate and illuminating shared experiences often can do.  I am honored to have spent several days dancing with and diving into the depths of ourselves with these courageous and delightful women.

There's a certain magic, a palpable yet hard-to-explain feeling that's unique to every retreat I've facilitated and/or attended. A temporary community comes together, extending unearned trust in an experience and in each other and that, in and of itself, is where the magic lies. Retreats offer a safe space and place to give of ourselves to something we might not normally have in our day to day lives.  I know from having been a steady retreat participant and facilitator over the last twenty years, we need to be with each other in creative and curious, open and tender truth-telling ways. We human beings are hungry for experiences that help us remember what's really important in our lives and remind us of our own humanity.

We are a fragile species on the edge of tearing one another and this world apart.

And so what is one to do when filled with longing to be more compassionate and considerate, more calm and centered, more loving and forgiving?  How do we best take care of ourselves so that our lives feel both meaningful and full of possibility?  

We deeply listen.  

Sometimes solitude is best to delve into one's own mind and body and all that it contains; thoughts, beliefs, memories, emotions, feelings.  Sometimes it's better to explore all those things in the company of others. For me, I've found a sweet in-between spot where solo contemplation and group exploration nurture each other. 

In support of that above named sweet spot, I am about to embark on a retreat adventure overseas that I'm really excited about.  I also recently made a decision I felt was important to honor my own process and personal desires which was to invite familiar friends to join me in Maui in October. What this means is...

The next Uninhibited Retreat will be in March 2017. 

The deep listening that's taking place within me needs this time to reflect and remember what makes me feel most free. Upon my return, I trust those longings of mine will have been well-attended to and the Uninhibited Retreat will have evolved into the kind of embodied experience that holds strong appeal for women who not only love to dance, but who want to be deeply seen, heard and felt through their creative expression and presence. I'll be ready November 1 to welcome in those who might consider joining me.  

A Time to Unpack Your Heart

 

Meet me where the sunlight ends
Meet me where the truth never bends
Bring all that you're scared to defend

And lay it down when you walk through my door
Throw all of it out on the floor
Your sorrow, your beauty, your war
I want it all, I want it all

Bring your secrets, bring your scars
Bring your glory, all you are
Bring your daylight, bring your dark
Share your silence
And unpack your heart

Show me something the rest never seen
Give me all that you hope to receive
Your deepest regret dies with me

The days when you stumble and fall
The days when you grind to a crawl
The treasure that hides behind your walls
I want it all, yeah I want it all

Bring your secrets, bring your scars
Bring your glory, all you are
Bring your daylight, bring your dark
Share your silence
And unpack your heart
Then unpack your heart

Oh, I'm on your side
So shed your shadow
And watch it rise

Oh, I'm on your side
So shed your shadow
And watch it rise
Into your darkness
I'll shine a light

Bring your secrets, bring your scars
Bring your glory, all you are
Bring your daylight, bring your dark
Share your silence

Bring your honor, bring your shame
All your madness, I will tame
Won't you lay down, down your guard
Share your silence
And unpack your heart

I love this song. I love the tune, but I especially love the lyrics. They're an invitation to being vulnerable and real. To opening your heart in a deep and beautiful way to another. To becoming free of all the things you might fear.  This is my invitation to you. An opening for you to walk through. A time for you and me to become more free together. 

There is still time and still room for you to be a part of the next Uninhibited Retreat happening March 24-28th.  Registration will close ten days from now on March 1.

Come unpack your heart with me on Maui and... 

Show me something the rest never seen. 

 

An Uninhibited Question & Answer

What can your friends count on you for? 

I just returned from a sweet weekend of dance, delicious meals, dramatic weather and deep connection with some of my favorite people on the planet.  I would do pretty much anything for any one of these six friends of mine in the photo above.  

I would dance in the pouring down rain with them. 

I would buy them a meal, a bottle of wine, a plane ticket  and especially something special that they would want, but might not buy for themselves.

I would hold their gaze and not look away when they needed someone to see them. 

I would hold their hands in mine, hug them  hard and not let go until they do. 

I would tell them the truth even if it's hard to hear. 

I would be there for them when they asked, when they least expected it and when they needed someone or something, but didn't know who or how to ask.   

My friends can count on me to be fiercely loyal, relentlessly upbeat, ridiculously silly and real.

What is it that you give to your friends without a second thought?  What are the qualities of being others can rely on you for?  And if you had you  as a friend, could you count on you? 

You can count on being asked questions during this retreat that  will make your mind think, your heart feel and your spirit relax. When you take time out to delve into how you live your life and what's most important, thinking, feeling, relaxing  (and dancing!) is bound to happen.

Seven more weeks until the next retreat begins. Four more weeks to decide if you'll be a part of it. Registration closes October 1.  

Mo betta!

The third Uninhibited Retreat was just as good as the first and the second and...it was "mo betta."

"Mo betta" is an expression used in the Pidgin-English Hawaiian language that means "better than better, the best."  

While each of the Uninhibited retreats have been special in and of themselves, the content and the depth of this experience just keeps getting better and better every time. This has been my hope all along. When I created this particular event more than a year and a half ago,  I knew it was something I was committing to over the long-term. I wanted to make this event a consistent offering and I wanted  it to offer the kind of experience people never forget.  I didn't want it to be big numbers-wise. I wanted it to be big feeling-wise.  

And oh, how we want to feel the full and extraordinary meaning and mystery of our lives! 

It is evident  to me as both the facilitator and as one of the participants, we need experiences that encourage us to feel all of what we feel without having to worry about what others think or weaken whatever emotion within us that wants outward expression.  In this technological world, we crave time to slow down, to relish real face-to-face conversations, to savor skin-on-skin contact and to feel  our own and each other's most raw and beautiful presence.   

I want more of this in my own life.  I want more of these heart-full and spirit-filled connections with others.  I want more love, compassion and truth in the world.  And so...until the next Uninhibited Retreat, I will continue to open my heart, deepen my connection with spirit and feel all  that is my life.  I encourage you to do the same. 

The next Uninhibited Retreat is October 22-26 and registration opens July 1.   

The A-Z Alphabets of Inhibited/Uninhibited

Read this A-Z list and then check in with how you feel. 

Abstain

Block

Constrain

Disallow

Exclude

Forbid 

Galumph

Hinder

Inhibit

Kibosh 

Junked 

Limit

Muzzle

Nix

Obstruct

Prohibit  

Quash

Repress 

Stifle

Thwart

Unacknowledged

Veto

Withhold  

X-tinguish 

Zapped 

 

How about this one?

Allow

Boundless

Connected

Delight

Expansive

Free

Go-ahead

Heartsome 

Infinite

Just

Kick-ass

Liberated

Moving

Nexus

Open

Proclaim

Quagswag

Real

Spacious

Thrilling

Unrestrained

Vast

Welcomed

X-hilarating

Yummy

Zippadeedoodah

 

What kind of alphabet would you like to create and live  this year? 

There are just a few days left to say YES to attending the next Uninhibited Retreat that's happening here on Maui March 19-23. 

If not next month, perhaps October? Registration for the second retreat of 2015 opens up July 1.

 

How are you...really?

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Being inhibited serves no one...most of all, you.  

As an example, think about how many times someone has asked you, "How are you?"  Consider how often your response was "Fine" when 'fine' was the last thing you truly felt in that moment the question was asked.  

Maybe what you were really feeling was sad or pissed off.  Maybe you were feeling lonely or indifferent and didn't want to answer that damn question.  Maybe you were so happy or incredibly horny you didn't believe you could answer that truthfully.  

Saying how you really feel might make others feel uncomfortable, but that's not your issue to take on. The issue worthy of taking on is being honest with yourself and expressing what's present and real within you.

How do we do that?

How do we say how we feel or tell others what we think and not take the easy (sometimes the less painful) way out by offering up something that we know is less than the truth?   

My response a couple years ago would have been...carefully-which would be to edit as soon as I encountered resistance. My response  nowadays  is... mindfully with care - which is to pay attention to what's present within me first and then  speak from that place of knowing what's true for me and keep going. 

And how do we respond mindfully with care to any question or anything that comes our way in life that might inhibit us from being real with others? 

Listen first.   To our bodies, our inner voices, our own unique experience . Speak second. With words, gestures, tones and pauses that bring forth what's most true within us in the moment we're expressing it.   

Expressing how you really feel and telling people what you really think doesn't always make friends and doesn't always make sense, but in all ways, telling what's true for you will set you free. 

The next time someone asks you "How are you?" Give them more than just "Fine."  Give them your truth. 

HERE'S A TRUTH OF MINE...

I'm excited about next month's retreat.  There are currently five women who will be a part of this experience and I'd love to see 2-3 more people join us. There are 10 days left before the "doors close"  and the chance to dance in this retreat is complete.  March 1 is the final day to register.    

 

The Uninhibited Manifesto

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I really wanted to call this an ultimatum instead of a manifesto, but when I looked up the definition, I didn't like one of the ways in which that word was defined.

Ultimatum...a final, uncompromising demand or set of terms issued by a party to a dispute, the rejection of which may lead to a severance of relations or to the use of force. 

That sounded rather...severe.

So I went with my original desire which was the right thing to begin with.  I have more to say about original, burning desires, but I'll save that for another soon-to-be-written post.

Manifesto... a public declaration of intentions, opinions, objectives, or motives, as one issued by a government, sovereign, or organization. 

That not only sounds better, it feels better.

And that's the whole point of being uninhibited... 

 Feeling Better!  

Feeling, as in experiencing and embodying whatever it is you truly desire in life  and better, as in living what is most true for you. So one definition of uninhibited might be...

Uninhibited - a way of being or embodiment that expresses the truest experience of oneself and one's desires.

It is my intention to live my life in this manner. It is my wish to inspire all who may read this. It is my offering and invitation to come to Maui and take part in an experience of movement and embodiment that will shake your limbs, stir your senses  and serve you in a myriad of ways.    

~The Uninhibited Manifesto~

I am free. I am free to live my life as I choose.To flourish and falter and...not fail. I learn. I am free to trust my gut. To make my decisions and have my doubts and...not dismiss that still voice within. I listen. I am free to speak my truth. To say what wants to be spoken and state what's obvious to me and...not silence myself so as to not offend others. I communicate. I am free to follow my dreams. To discover if they're wild and worthy or weak and wavering and...not wonder if my imagination is too big. I desire. I am free to express my emotions. To crack up with laughter at inappropriate times or curl up into a ball and spill tears onto the floor and...not cover up ever. I feel. I am free to move my body how it wants to. To experience both pleasure and pain and...not prevent aging or postpone my own death. I transform. I am free to reject the status quo. To stand up for what's right and shift others' perspectives and...not stay the course. I act. I am free to ask for what I need. To make bold requests and brave offers and...not boast. I inspire. I am free to change my mind. To ponder at great lengths and profess unpopular opinions and...not procrastinate. I grow. I am free to be me. To bring forth, fall apart, let go, begin again, fuck up, turn around, sign off, love hard and move on and...not give up, hide out or hold back anything. I live.